Welcome friend,
I’m Mark, and this space is for the wanderers, the worn out, and the ones still wrestling with God at 2 a.m. I don’t have all the answers, but I know the One who does—and I’m learning to trust Him more.
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“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” – John 8:36
Growing Up Halfway
Jay Fisher grew up knowing God mattered, but God was never at the center. His parents split, his mother moved away, and his dad worked so much that he was hardly around. By 15, he was already mocking faith. He even tore pages out of a Bible to roll joints.
Then one night, he had a vision so real he could still feel it years later—he fell straight into hell. The screams, the fire, the judgment—it was terrifying. In desperation, he cried out to Jesus, and Jesus pulled him out.
But even after that, he lived halfway for nearly two decades.
Revelation 3:15–16: “I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.”
The Mask of Sin
Halfway meant lying to himself and everyone else. He lied about addiction, money, and where he was. Cocaine, strip clubs, porn—he numbed himself and thought that as long as he kept up appearances, he was fine. But inside, he was dying.
He didn’t just flirt with sin—he married it. And every day the enemy whispered: “You’ll never change. You’ll always come back to me.” For years, he believed that lie.
The Cracks Begin to Show
He tried to lead in his own strength—jobs, teams, even his family—but it always ended in burnout, cruelty, or shame. Eventually, his marriage collapsed. They realized they weren’t the same people outside of getting high, so they split.
Yet even in that wreckage, God was planting seeds.
2 Corinthians 12:9: “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”
Turning Points and Tragedy
He eventually got clean and met Deidre, who guided him toward a better path. But he still wasn’t chasing God. It took a few more years, the death of his father, and crushing struggles before he realized how much he needed Jesus.
Together, he and Deidre faced one of the darkest seasons—losing a child, and nearly losing her too. That pain broke them, but it also drove them closer to Christ. Later, God blessed them with another child, and that became a turning point. From then on, they steadied themselves in His Word and in His church.
“You Can Lead”
One Sunday after church, a scrap of paper literally landed at his feet. Three words were scribbled on it: “You can lead.” That was God’s reminder that leadership wasn’t about power—it was about surrender.
Fatherhood Changes Everything
Fatherhood sealed the change. Doctors had said it wasn’t likely, but God had other plans. Becoming a dad humbled him. He didn’t want his kids to wonder about his faith the way he had always wondered about his father’s.
He realized his greatest ministry might not be behind a microphone or a pulpit—but in holding a flashlight while his kids walked down the path God had for them.
Proverbs 22:6: “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
No Longer Halfway
Today, he isn’t perfect and he isn’t finished, but he’s no longer halfway. Halfway Wasn’t Enough became more than the title of his book—it became the story of his life. Out of it was born From Halfway—a testimony and movement dedicated to devotionals, discipleship, and even children’s books that fund charity.
Its mission is simple: to ignite souls, guard the flame of faith, and forge warriors for Christ.
What This Teaches Us
You can’t live halfway with God. Compromise doesn’t free you—it chains you. Sin whispers, but Christ shouts louder. The enemy will say, “you’ll never change,” but the cross proves otherwise. Jesus rescues, restores, and repurposes even the most broken stories into testimonies that point back to Him.
Call to Repentance:
If you’ve been trying to earn your way into heaven, it’s time to stop striving and start surrendering. Today can be the day everything changes. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 6:2, “Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.” Don’t wait for a better moment. Turn from your sin, believe in the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross, and receive the gift of eternal life. He is calling—respond to Him today.
Call to Action:
If this message spoke to your heart, don’t keep it to yourself. Share it with someone you love—and make sure to subscribe so you never miss more biblical truth, encouragement, and hope. Let’s walk this journey of faith together.
I’ve read this article three times and each reading reveals a new chapter about Jay’s walk with the Lord. It also shows your ability to delicately honor his pain while pointing to his restoration. It’s clear that the Lord left the ninety nine to go after him.