Thank you for your authenticity and vulnerability in sharing what the Lord did in the decisions and addictions of the flesh.
I could relate to a lot especially the betrayal of someone telling me they would care for my fur baby and then he was gone. It tore my world up at the time leading me back to the wider roads to a deeper pit of self destruction…BUT GOD had better plans once I became willing to surrender, He took the shame, guilt, blame and brought good from all the emotions and hopelessness I had.
A couple worship songs came to mind as I was reading and I will share below. I am so grateful we serve a God who stays.
"And they overcame by the blood of the lamb and the word of their testimony, and they loved not their lives unto the death." Powerful testimony of what brought you to the place of unconditional surrender. Thank you for sharing.
Your story is not just about surviving brokenness. It is about awakening to real surrender. It shows the moment when striving finally gives way to belonging, and bargaining gives way to trust. That is something holy, and it deserves to be honored.
What stands out most is not how far things fell, but how patiently God waited for sincerity to replace negotiation. Your journey shows that surrender cannot be a strategy. It cannot be a way to get relief or blessing. The moment surrender is tied to an outcome, it stops being surrender and becomes control.
You revealed something many miss: God does not exist to fix our coping systems. He exists to replace them. Healing begins not when pain ends, but when control ends. When we stop asking God to bless what fear built and allow Him to dismantle it, even when it hurts, real transformation begins. Your obedience became different. Quieter. Truer. No longer driven by desperation, but by reverence. Not, “God, change my life,” but “God, take my life.” That shift speaks of real maturity and courage.
You also uncovered something essential about spiritual growth: closeness to God is not sustained by emotion, but by consistency. We drift not because we stop believing, but because we stop remembering. That is why daily Scripture and devotion matter so deeply. They recalibrate the heart and interrupt the slow erosion of faith.
Satan rarely destroys through sudden collapse. I think he prefers quiet drift. Daily returning to God exposes that drift early and keeps surrender alive. Your freedom did not come from trying harder. It came because you stopped managing God and allowed God to manage you. That is not weakness. That is strength shaped by humility. Your life now speaks hope to others! You can wander long; you can rebuild late, and you can still be fully met by grace. Not because God is permissive, but because He is faithful.
It's that constant pattern that spoke to me. Lust and porn addiction are not spoken about often because we either to fearful of what others will say what our families or friends will say.. What no him? Can't be! Nobody is perfect we all fall short and people need to hear more stories like these I have a book though about this what we expose ourselves to. But thank you for sharing. I'd like a coffee please🤣🤣🤣
Thank you for your authenticity and vulnerability in sharing what the Lord did in the decisions and addictions of the flesh.
I could relate to a lot especially the betrayal of someone telling me they would care for my fur baby and then he was gone. It tore my world up at the time leading me back to the wider roads to a deeper pit of self destruction…BUT GOD had better plans once I became willing to surrender, He took the shame, guilt, blame and brought good from all the emotions and hopelessness I had.
A couple worship songs came to mind as I was reading and I will share below. I am so grateful we serve a God who stays.
The God Who Stays by Matthew West
Love Moved First by Casting Crowns
https://open.substack.com/pub/fishermelissa332/p/what-you-repeatedly-allow-will-shape-7f4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=6ysmz3
Hope you don't mind me dropping it here it aligns with what you spoke about 🙏🏼
No of course not! I just shared it! It was a good read!
Thank you🙏🏼
Wow! Now this is a very good story. More people men and women needs to hear this story. 🙏🏼
"And they overcame by the blood of the lamb and the word of their testimony, and they loved not their lives unto the death." Powerful testimony of what brought you to the place of unconditional surrender. Thank you for sharing.
Your story is not just about surviving brokenness. It is about awakening to real surrender. It shows the moment when striving finally gives way to belonging, and bargaining gives way to trust. That is something holy, and it deserves to be honored.
What stands out most is not how far things fell, but how patiently God waited for sincerity to replace negotiation. Your journey shows that surrender cannot be a strategy. It cannot be a way to get relief or blessing. The moment surrender is tied to an outcome, it stops being surrender and becomes control.
You revealed something many miss: God does not exist to fix our coping systems. He exists to replace them. Healing begins not when pain ends, but when control ends. When we stop asking God to bless what fear built and allow Him to dismantle it, even when it hurts, real transformation begins. Your obedience became different. Quieter. Truer. No longer driven by desperation, but by reverence. Not, “God, change my life,” but “God, take my life.” That shift speaks of real maturity and courage.
You also uncovered something essential about spiritual growth: closeness to God is not sustained by emotion, but by consistency. We drift not because we stop believing, but because we stop remembering. That is why daily Scripture and devotion matter so deeply. They recalibrate the heart and interrupt the slow erosion of faith.
Satan rarely destroys through sudden collapse. I think he prefers quiet drift. Daily returning to God exposes that drift early and keeps surrender alive. Your freedom did not come from trying harder. It came because you stopped managing God and allowed God to manage you. That is not weakness. That is strength shaped by humility. Your life now speaks hope to others! You can wander long; you can rebuild late, and you can still be fully met by grace. Not because God is permissive, but because He is faithful.
It's that constant pattern that spoke to me. Lust and porn addiction are not spoken about often because we either to fearful of what others will say what our families or friends will say.. What no him? Can't be! Nobody is perfect we all fall short and people need to hear more stories like these I have a book though about this what we expose ourselves to. But thank you for sharing. I'd like a coffee please🤣🤣🤣