Why Porn Isn’t Your Identity and How Jesus Breaks the Chains
A Battle Plan for Christians on How to Overcome Lust and Porn Addiction
Hello everyone. I’m Mark and I’m an addict.
That’s right—I’m a Christian, and I’m an addict.
Quite the unexpected monologue right?
Good. This isn’t the typical “Narrow Path Collective” article. It shouldn’t be. Its meant to challenge and equip the saints. Read on if you are struggling. This is for you.
Here’s the honest truth: I’m no different than the homesexual struggling with same-gender attraction, or the alcoholic who swears the last drink will be the last one. My fight just wears a different mask. I wrestle with lustful thoughts. I have to turn my eyes away in public, guard my mind, and use apps like Truple to keep me from wandering online.
Solo trips? Can’t do them. I know myself too well. The temptation is too real.
But the thing is—I refuse to hide behind shame anymore. This isn’t who I am and porn isn’t my identity. It’s a chain, and Jesus is the chain breaker.
If you’ve ever knelt beside your bed whispering, “God, please, not again,” you’re not alone, because I’ve been there. I still walk that road and I still struggle. But the difference is—I don’t walk it alone anymore.
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“For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.”
— Galatians 5:1
Some Facts First
Before we begin, allow me to first provide you with some necessary facts. This isn’t meant to shame anyone. I think it is important to know beforehand how porn effects us emotionally and spiritually.
Brain Changes
Researchers found that heavy pornography users showed measurable differences in brain structure and function — including less gray matter in reward-related areas of the brain. End Sexual Exploitation
Porn rewires the reward system: what once gave pleasure may fade, causing the brain to seek more intense stimulation. Covenant Eyes
Early exposure matters: when young minds (still developing) are exposed to explicit material, it establishes “arousal templates” and sexual scripts that may be harder to break later. Culture Reframed
Mental & Emotional Effects
Frequent porn use is linked with increased anxiety, depression, and cognitive-emotional distress. PMC
Because the brain bonds to the porn-experience rather than to real relational intimacy, it weakens motivation for healthy relationships and normal emotional engagement.
A Warning: When Porn Becomes More Than Habit
It’s important to say up front: watching porn does not mean someone will become a serial killer. That would be sensational and misleading. But some studies show a pattern worth noting:
Among a studied group of sex killers, researchers found those individuals more often collected pornography (though this is correlation, not proof of causation). PubMed
Some interviews with known serial killers (for example, Ted Bundy) include their own statements about how porn played a role in how their fantasies escalated. The Battalion
One researcher wrote: “Some studies suggest that a subset of serial killers use pornography to rehearse and validate their fantasies of control and domination.” joniejohnstonpsyd.substack.com
Porn can distort your mind, desensitize your heart, reduce your ability to empathize, and increase risk behaviors. It’s not the direct cause of extreme violence for most people—but it can be a factor in a larger downward spiral if left unchecked and unmanaged.
The Secret Struggle
Pornography is the silent epidemic in the church.
It hides in the shadows. It’s the one thing we don’t talk about because we’re terrified someone might find out.
I used to think I was the only one. I’d repent, delete everything, promise God I was done—and a few weeks later, I’d fall again.
Then came the shame spiral:
“God must be done with me.”
“I’m not really saved.”
“I’ll never be free.”
But I’ve come to realize those thoughts weren’t conviction—they were condemnation. The enemy loves to whisper, “You’ll always be this way.” But Jesus says otherwise.
“If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” — John 8:36
Freedom doesn’t mean you never feel temptation again. It just means you’re no longer its prisoner.
Bring the Darkness Into the Light
Porn feeds on secrecy and sin thrives in silence.
The first step toward freedom is confession.
Tell God the truth. Just be honest. Seriously. Don’t try to come up with a poetic prayer line to God. Just confess from the heart. He already knows, but He wants you to hand it over willingly.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” — 1 John 1:9
Next step. Find a trusted brother or sister in Christ. Someone who loves Jesus more than they love your comfort. Accountability is not meant to be shameful. That’s why its key to finding someone trustworthy.
My suggestion? Choose someone you would never want to find out about your “embarassing moment.” I’m talking like….your Mom, Dad, Grandmother. You wouldn’t want Ol’ Granny discovering what your looking at would you? Me neither. That’s why I suggest it.
If you don’t have someone yet, look into groups like:
Starve the Sin, Feed the Spirit
You can’t keep feeding what’s trying to kill you.
Porn is more than a bad habit—it’s a spiritual parasite. Every click numbs your soul and rewires your brain. Scientists call it “dopamine flooding.” Scripture calls it “slavery to sin.”
Romans 6:16 says, “You are slaves of the one you obey.”
So what are you feeding?
Practical steps matter:
Install filters: Truple, Covenant Eyes, or Accountable2You.
Cut off easy access: No private browsers, no secret devices.
Block temptations: Replace social media scrolls with Scripture.
Fill idle time: Lust grows in boredom. Stay busy—pray, serve, work out, mow the yard, study Scripture, or call a friend when temptation hits.
An idle mind is the devil’s workshop. When your thoughts sit still too long, sin will start whispering. Keep your hands and heart busy doing things that glorify God.
And just to clarify, I don’t mean this in a Bible thumping, heartless preachy kind of way. I’m just trying to prepare you for the spiritual battle. Because, that’s what this is. Its spiritual warfare and every small choice to starve sin gives space for the Holy Spirit to breathe.
Renew Your Mind Daily
Porn doesn’t just affect what you watch—it changes how you see.
It trains your mind to view people as pixels instead of souls. It steals your empathy and replaces it with appetite.
The only way to reverse that is through renewal.
Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind.”
Feed your mind with truth:
Reading a Proverb every morning.
Memorize Job 31:1 — “I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin?”
Journal your triggers and victories.
Every time you choose Scripture over screens, you’re rewiring your heart toward holiness.
Don’t Fight Alone
Lust isolates. The enemy’s tactic has always been the same—divide and devour.
Peter warned, “Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” — 1 Peter 5:8
Lions attack the one that wanders off, not the herd.
You need people in your corner. Brothers who check in. A mentor who prays for you. A pastor who doesn’t flinch when you confess.
If you don’t have that kind of circle yet, build one:
Join a men’s or women’s Bible study.
Find an accountability partner through Every Man’s Battle.
Connect through our Subscriber Chat
Learn to See People as God Does
Porn dehumanizes. Jesus restores.
When you start seeing others as God’s image-bearers—not objects—you begin to heal.
The next time you’re tempted, pray:
“Lord, help me see them the way You see them.”
You can’t lust after someone you’re praying for.
Lust objectifies; love intercedes.
And if you fall again, remember this:
“The righteous falls seven times and rises again.” — Proverbs 24:16
Jesus understands that you’re not perfect. Now does this mean we go on sinning? Of course not. Even Paul explains this plainly in scripture:
“What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound?
By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it?” - Romans 6: 1-2
Remember Grace Is Greater Than Guilt
You’ll fail sometimes. It happens.
Paul wrestled with his own thorn, begging God to remove it. He never did. God made him depend on Him more.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” — 2 Corinthians 12:9
Maybe God hasn’t erased your addiction because He’s teaching you dependence. He wants your heart, not your performance.
Mercy doesn’t run out in God’s economy.
Replace Lust With Purpose
Freedom is about walking in your calling, not stressing yourself to death about avoiding sin. Make it a priority to grow closer to God and abide in Jesus and the temptations will eventually become easier to handle.
Serve in your church. Mentor others. Start a ministry. Write, create, or build something holy out of what once broke you.
A.W. Tozer said, “The man who would truly know God must give time to Him.”
Give Him your time, your energy, and your imagination—and watch Him turn ashes into beauty.
Conclusion: You’re Not a Lost Cause — You’re a Work in Progress
If you’ve made it all the way to the end of this, take a second and let that sink in. It means you’re tired of the cycle. It means something deep in you is hungry for freedom. And it means you haven’t given up on who God says you can be — even if the fight wears you down some days.
This battle isn’t won in one dramatic moment. Most of the time, it’s quieter than that. It looks like choosing prayer when your mind wants to wander. Reaching out to someone instead of isolating. Opening Scripture when opening a browser would be easier. It’s a hundred small decisions that slowly pull you out of the darkness and back into the light.
And here’s the part we forget: Jesus isn’t repulsed by the struggle. He isn’t disappointed that you’re still fighting this. He isn’t standing at a distance waiting for you to get your act together. He meets you in it — right in the spot where you feel the weakest — and lifts you one more time, because that’s what a Savior does.
He’s not done with you. Not even close.
So take a breath.
Slow your shoulders.
Let grace settle into the places shame has been living too long.
You’re not clawing your way toward God’s acceptance — you already have it.
The Narrow Path Forward
One honest moment at a time, one prayer at a time, one tiny victory stacked on top of another. And before long, you’ll look back and realize the chains you thought would never fall off… aren’t even around your ankles anymore.
They broke.
He broke them.
And you kept walking.
Christian Hotline & Prayer Support
If you’re struggling or need someone to pray with you, please reach out:
National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Dial 988
Focus on the Family Prayer Line: 1-877-771-4357
The 700 Club Prayer Line: 1-800-700-7000
Billy Graham Evangelistic Association: 1-888-388-2683
Chatnow (24/7 Christian Chat & Prayer):
https://chatnow.org
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We pray, talk honestly, and remind each other that freedom in Christ is possible.
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Call to Repentance
If you’ve been trying to earn your way into heaven, it’s time to stop striving and start surrendering. Today can be the day everything changes.
The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 6:2, “Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.”
Don’t wait for a better moment. Turn from your sin, believe in the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross, and receive the gift of eternal life.
He is calling—respond to Him today.
Call to Action
If this message spoke to your heart, don’t keep it to yourself.
Share it with someone you love — and make sure to subscribe so you never miss more biblical truth, encouragement, and hope.
Let’s walk this journey of faith together.
Sources & Resources
Scripture: Galatians 5:1, John 8:36, 1 John 1:9, Romans 6:16, Romans 12:2, Job 31:1, 1 Peter 5:8, 2 Corinthians 12:9, Proverbs 24:16.
Recovery Tools:
Books:
At the end of the day, this battle isn’t about perfection — it’s about direction. If your heart is leaning toward Jesus, even on the days you stumble, you’re moving the right way. Keep choosing the next small step.
I needed this. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing such honest and raw truth 🙏🏽