You ever look back at something you posted and feel that slow, sinking feeling in your gut?
And, I’m not talking about fear. I’m talking about conviction.
That’s where this started.
A couple of weeks ago, I posted an image. Substack has taken it down since, but here’s what it was meant to show: a massive river dam about to burst, floodwaters rushing forward, labeled as Islam. It was raw and angry. It came from a place that felt justified at the time.
But justified doesn’t always mean Christlike.
And that’s where I failed.
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“But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return… Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful.” — Luke 6:35–36
What I Was Feeling (and Why That Matters)
I’ve been angry lately.
If I’m honest, really angry.
Christians are being persecuted all over the world. Churches burned, believers killed, families shattered…and yes—much of it comes at the hands of radical Islam. That reality sits heavy on the chest if you actually pay attention.
So when I made that image, it wasn’t abstract theology.
It was rage, grief, and fear dressed up as discernment.
A couple of people commented on that post and they happened to be Muslim.
And instead of seeing souls, I saw enemies.
I didn’t reply to their comments with patience, I shut the door. I condemned instead of inviting. I judged instead of pointing to mercy.
And, I forgot my favorite passage:
Luke 6:32–36.
Love your enemies.
Do good to those who hate you.
Be merciful.
I did none of that.
Where I Went Wrong
Here’s the hardest sentence to write:
I did not represent Christ well.
Not even a little.
Those comments weren’t attacks. They were curiosity. They were people standing close enough to hear me—and I pushed them away.
Jesus didn’t do that with me.
And that’s what wrecks me.
The Story That Broke Me Open
Not long after, I came across Malik Hassan’s story.
A Muslim man who had a near death experience and an encounter with Jesus.
Jesus forgave him.
Here’s a snippet of his story:
Malik Hassan, 68, says he spent decades respected in his Cairo neighborhood, literally holding the keys to his local mosque, while hiding an empty heart. “I was living a lie… I bowed down, but my mind was elsewhere. Inside, there was nothing.”
After a massive heart attack and three days in a coma, Malik says he awoke in complete darkness before seeing Jesus. “He was like a mountain of light,” Malik said. “He knew everything about me, and yet He loved me.” He recalls Jesus telling him, “I am the door. Give Me your burden. I have already paid for it.”
When Malik woke up, he cried out in the hospital, “Isa al-Masih, forgive me… save me… I belong to You.” The moment went viral, costing him his reputation, position, and respect. “I lost everything,” he said, “but I gained peace. I lost the fear of death.”
Today, Malik says simply, “I was blind, and now I see.” He adds, “If He can forgive a stubborn, hypocritical old man like me, He can forgive anyone.”
Where you can find his story:
YouTube – Christian Testimony Channels
Search terms that consistently surface his story:
“Malik Hassan NDE Jesus”
“Muslim man sees Jesus near death”
“Malik Hassan testimony”
Here’s a direct link: click here!
Christian blogs and testimony sites
His story has circulated in written form on:
Christian testimony blogs
Evangelism-focused websites
Conversion story compilations
Now back to my writing…
There were no conditions.
No lecture.
No “you should’ve known better.”
Just mercy.
That’s when the excuse well dried up.
Because if Christ can forgive him, and forgive me, who do I think I am to close the gate?
To My Muslim Readers (Yes, You)
If you’re Muslim and reading this, I want to say something plainly:
I’m sorry.
I should have met you with the Gospel, not a wall. I should have answered questions instead of assuming motives. I should have remembered that Jesus didn’t die only for people who already agreed with Him.
If you have questions—real ones, hard ones, ones you’ve been afraid to ask—I’m here.
And this time, I won’t turn you away.
Why I’m Writing This Now
Because confession matters.
Repentance isn’t theoretical.
And, the Gospel is bigger than my bad day, my bad post, or my bad attitude.
Someone needs to hear this:
You can be right about truth and still wrong in spirit.
I was.
And I’m asking Jesus to fix what I bent out of shape.
If this message stirred something in you—conviction, curiosity, or even frustration—I invite you to stay.
Grace didn’t stop with me. It shouldn’t stop with us.
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Call to Repentance:
If you’ve been trying to earn your way into heaven, it’s time to stop striving and start surrendering. Today can be the day everything changes. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 6:2, “Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.” Don’t wait for a better moment. Turn from your sin, believe in the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross, and receive the gift of eternal life. He is calling—respond to Him today.
Call to Action:
If this message spoke to your heart, don’t keep it to yourself. Share it with someone you love—and make sure to subscribe so you never miss more biblical truth, encouragement, and hope. Let’s walk this journey of faith together.
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This was a great article. Thank you for being so honest. It's so important to rely on God to provide patience and grace for us.